This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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