We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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