I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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