I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
