508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
