Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize