Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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