Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
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no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
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If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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