Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Is it penis luge time yet?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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