Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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