Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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