smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize