She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
