just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night