all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
