i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
