the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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