i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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