I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
