he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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