My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
