That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
