She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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