just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
