Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
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