I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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