Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize