She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize