You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
