What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
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