Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
