you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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