no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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