We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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