Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
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