You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
