He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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