Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize