I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
