Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
