I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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