I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
