Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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