she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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