:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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