And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize