Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
