Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize
