In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
