paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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