When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize