Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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